Long day

Visited the grandpa in the hospital.. Again. I know right. Sigh my 92 year old grandfather hasn't been doing too well of late, I don't want to think about it nor do I want to speak about it but I'm making my best effort to visit him as often as time permits.

I love my grandfather to bits and pieces and I know when that day comes.. There will be so many broken hearts. I only hope God can be kind enough to give us more time.

The past few days I deposited joy to help them out and I must say, I really enjoyed the freedom. Sometimes I feel like she is like a shadow constantly hovering around me.

I have a weird personality, I enjoy slogging and doing everything myself, I know right so crazy but it is a sort of satisfaction when you know you can do it, regardless of how tired you know. It's called pushing the limits. I like it, being exhausted and going to bed. It means that a day is well spent.

And, I like my privacy. I don't even think I'll hire one when I have my own home. I grew up without a maid and I've seen how couples without a maid cope and manage life, even with children. I like independence and as much as how household chores are a dread, it is a glimpse of reality.

Well of course maybe the toilets won't be so well scrubbed, or the dishes might pile up, or the toys would be scattered everywhere. But does it matter? Hehe. I somehow think that a mess makes the home more "homely".

I can't imagine living in a 92sqf home with an additional stranger.. Thanks, but no thanks. Then again, having a second child might change my mind, I don't know. Life is changing every second, we must live life with a tinge of unpredictability at all times. I always tell myself.. If I don't make mistakes now, when am I gonna make them?


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